Processing And Healing

Rest:

"The most selfish thing you can do is not process where you are, because you won't become who you're supposed to be for people; to the glory of God." -Chandler Moore

I am learning the true value of rest. I once believed rest meant a night in, a nap, or a much-needed vacation. While all of these things are great, I've learned that they are not rest but an act of retreating. Retreating is avoiding the real issue, rest true rest means to face it head on with the Lord. It’s in the stillness of life that I got to know what’s actually happening to me, what’s wrong, and most importantly what the Lord is saying to me about it. So much of my life has been lived through memories, it was hard for me to enjoy the present because everything around me glorifies the quickness of things. When I entered true rest and processed where I was in life, I found gratitude for the things I didn't have because it showed me my dependence on the Lord. Rest showed me I was in need. I needed help and it created space for me to receive that help even before I got comfortable asking for it boldly. It made me realize my hyper independence was toxic not only to myself but also to the people who have sacrificed and genuinely showed up for me during this season of my life.

Letting my hyper independence go was a catalyst for my growth and an act of love towards myself. Someone recently told me to receive is to allow myself to be loved which is an act of self-love and it really changed the way I view asking for help. I prided myself on doing things alone because if I am honest, I subconsciously attached my worth to how hard I worked and how much I achieved alone. Can you relate? I prided myself on having some form of a plan or idea for the next steps of life even if I hadn’t begun because it covered up the shame, I felt for not being past this stage in my life. My ego felt less bruised if I struggled. I carried this same behavior into my relationship with the Lord. But as scripture says, " God humbles the proud." And man was I humbled, I saw how quickly everything can change and yet how gentle the Lord still was towards me. I was in need and yet I never truly lacked. I needed help, prayer, belief in my unbelief, a true friend, an ear, a laugh, I needed Jesus every minute of every day, I still do. I need and I’m so comfortable admitting that now because it simultaneously opened my eyes to the beauty of what I hold as a daughter (or son) of Christ. It showed me my authority, it revived my belief, it exposed my scarcity mindset and allowed me to take hold of a kingdom mindset. It reminded me I am a citizen of heaven. It broke my shame; rest allowed me to walk in the freedom Jesus paid the price for. Rest gave me room to realize my strongholds and patterns, it exposed my unbelief, it showed me what I prioritize, and it unmasked my rejection towards myself. I realized before this season of my life I wasn't really resting I was simply distracting myself to stay afloat. so, what did I do about it? I surrendered and sat at the feet of Jesus and wept like Mary Magdalene. I allowed his peace to truly take hold of my heart and mind. I asked him to transform my heart and to give me a heart that truly wants to know and love him. When is the last time you asked the Lord to do this? I met with the Lord consistently and allowed his word to transform my anxiousness. I believed him when he said he died for me and trusted that He and his grace were sufficient for me. I died to myself and allowed my appetite to change. I allowed his sanctification to cleanse me and accepted that sanctification is a process. Rest allowed me to see the next steps of where the Lord is calling me to, and it allowed me to go after it fearlessly because it opened my eyes to who I am called by and for.

I want to encourage anyone reading this to truly sit down with a notebook or to open your notes app and answer the next few questions honestly.

If you have been stuck in the same cycles in your life, are you truly surrendered?

Who gets blessed by you becoming?

now that you have named some people or generations,

Has your surrender truly allowed for that to take fruition?

Is Christ truly getting the Glory out of your life at this very moment?

Truly ask the Lord to transform your heart, ask him for a heart that truly wants to know and love Him.

Your obedience matters. It has always mattered because truly it is bigger than you. It's bigger than the ache you experience during the process. It's bigger than the dying of self. It's bigger than the riches that may come along the way. It's important to God that you are obedient because behind your obedience is a generation of people receiving guidance through the path you choose to walk for the Glory of God.

Song of the day: Breathe- Maverick City Music

https://youtu.be/mR-D3bvi-4E?si=-yH3TC8TQ6wkHfXI

OR

https://open.spotify.com/track/0G20Y1YJ7wD1GqmKXq9JVn?si=jXsuy6IYT7eSVEWD9TmzGA

Colossians 2:2 NIV

"My goal is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ."